My older son and his family (wife and two grandchildren) lived across the country from me, and then a year ago?

moved much closer.. about 1-1/2 hours way. I was thrilled. Before they moved closer, I spent a lot of time, energy and money to be with them as often as I could when they lived so far away. I helped them through some tough times, financially and emotionally. Sometimes I traveled to see them 7 or 8 times a year for at least a week or two (fortunate that I can do that and still work). When they moved close, well, it was like a walk in the park to be with them, and they always wanted to spend time with me (son, daughter in law, and especially the boys, 3 and 2).


Now.. they are moving again, about 1,000 miles from me and not as easy to get to.. but it wasn't all that easy before.


My problem is that I am very, very attached to my grandsons. They have become my little stars and they want to be with Grandma as much as possible.


Their move is about a month away, and I am not handling it as gracefully as I need to.. and want to.


Their lives have impacted mine so much, that I am wilting just thinking about the distance between us again.


I am an active person. I work, I volunteer, I have friends, I have great siblings, I have my sweet granddaughter who lives much closer to me.


And yet, to not see these boys grow up.. well, I don't know quite what to do.


I'm a strong woman - everyone who knows me knows that - but this is different.


I offered them alternative to the moves, and ones that would have worked very well. I know they have their own lives to live, but the place they have chosen is not a good place. In fact, it's a dangerous place to live.


And I won't be close. I can't control everything, but I know my son has not made the best decision possible even though he is an extremely responsible young man (a minister and teacher).


*Sigh*


I'm a sad Grandma. A worried Grandma.


Anyone else have something like this.. any experience... ??|||My mom went through a situation very much like yours when my brother and his wife moved 2300 miles away with their three children. They all signed up for Skype so they could do online video calls. It's not quite the same as being there in person, but it's helped my mom quite a bit. She enjoys being able to interact with them visually, and loves that they can hold up their drawings for her to see or perform their latest song/dance. Maybe you guys should check into something like that. It's not as ideal as having them there, but it could make it all a little easier to cope with.|||Well, I haven't but I would say that you're a completely normal grandma. Unfortunately, your dreams and the parents' dreams aren't meshing.





You volunteer? I suggest start volunteering at an elementary school helping children be better readers or something. You NEED that connection to kids and unfortunately, you're not going to get it from your grandkids. Also, ask your daughter or son to be truthful - do they appreciate your visits or not??


It might hurt but at least you would know for sure.|||my dear Grandma-why not buy a kit (SKPYE) with video camera and offer them one by gift?Life is like that what can be done?We have so many at hi-tec to bring distant relatives nearer!|||Yes and it is difficult. All you can do is visit as often as possible, send cards and letters to the kids and maybe provide a web cam for the computer so they don't feel so far away. Unfortunately, our children often don't make the choices that we like, however, it is their life and their children and you need to accept this change as gracefully as possible. You may find that they will not enjoy this change as much as they believe and move back your way as the children become more mobile and they need more help. Be very careful to not make the move an issue between you and your son. Do not be so quick to offer financial incentives either. It would not be a good lesson to pass to your grand kids that grandma is buying their love.


Chin up and time will take care of things.